The Car Full of the Wrong Things
When I moved to LA, I packed my little Chevy Cavalier  (a 1993 RS, manual transmission) with everything I thought I'd need. I remember the clothing. Most of it turned out to be completely wrong for SoCal. I remember a whole arsenal of bath and beauty products — also wrong. The California climate apparently does not care about your carefully curated New York hair and makeup situation.

I remember accessories, a couple pieces of bedding, my favorite pillow. The bedding ended up being too heavy for about ten months of the year. Thank God for the pillow. Thank God for the car itself. Those were the things that actually kept me alive on the other side of that drive.

But looking back at how packed that little Cavalier was? It's kind of impressive, actually. Impressive that I thought I needed all of it. Impressive that I thought it would help. Because in a lot of ways, all of it became a hindrance as I tried to figure out how to actually live out here.

When I finally got stable housing, I had very little to operate with — what I'd driven out to LA with (much of which was not helpful) and what I picked up along the way. One pot. One fork. One knife. One spoon. One cup. Mattress on the floor. No table — I ate off a microwave box for at least a year and a half. And there are days where I genuinely  long for that simplicity once again. No real opportunity for dishes to pile up, in a situation like that, you know?

Now, every reasonable guide to preparing for a big move would have called what I did dangerous. Reckless. Unprepared. And, it probably was, to some degree.

But here is what I couldn't have known as an early twenty-something, pulling onto route 17 headed west with a car full of the wrong things: The packing to be prepared wasn't the problem. It was a symptom. Because in the end, being prepared just isn't the same thing as being ready.


And Then He Just... Sends Them
This week, Jesus gives it all away. He's been moving through towns and villages, teaching, healing, proclaiming good news of the realm of God being close by. And somewhere in all that movement, Matthew says he looks up. He sees the crowd. And he has compassion for them. Why? Because they are harassed and helpless, he says. Living in the midst of oppressive systems that are harming them severely.... They are "like sheep without a shepherd."

And then he says to his disciples: the harvest is plentiful. The workers are few. Pray for more workers.
And then — before they can process that statement (before we can even process that statement) Jesus turns and sends them.
You besties. You are the "more" workers. You are the answer to the prayer I just told you to pray.

That is a wild move. He doesn't ask if they feel prepared. He doesn't wait for their confidence and supply levels to be optimal. He just sends them with a delightfully, alarmingly light packing list.


What You're Actually Carrying
No gold. No silver. No copper. No bag. No extra tunic. Just... go.

It's easy to read this as Jesus being severe. Maybe even recklessly sending people out with nothing into a world that can be dangerous, inhospitable, and violent. But I don't think that is what is happening here.
Because what I've learned about packing the wrong things is that the things were never really the problem, but they did generate and maintain more than a few problems.

Here's what I mean. When I was cramming that Cavalier full of New York Sam's New York things  (the right outfits for the right occasions, the particular products, the accessories that communicated something specific about who I was) I wasn't packing for California and who Sam was becoming. I was trying to transport a static identity across the country in a 1993 Chevy Cavalier.

Note how I still have to tell you what kind of car it was. It's surprising I haven't also told you what color and whether it was a coupe or sedan.

At any rate: those things I had with me were, theoretically, doing something for me. Not necessarily helpful things. They were providing cover. A way to hide behind a version of myself I already knew. A particular kind of comfort that kept me from actually engaging with where I was, who was around me, what and who God was asking me become. When you're carrying that much stuff (literal, or proverbial), you can't really see where you're going. You're too busy making an attempt at maintaining what you've already got.

So when Jesus looks at his group of besties and says take nothing, I don't think he's being harsh. I think he is being mercifully intelligent and setting them up to succeed.  I think he knows the things will become a stumbling block  preventing them from seeing the baggage that can (and will, most likely) prevent them from participating in God's mission in the world. The packed things, the preparedness becomes... the need for control. The need to look competent. These things can support narratives they've already written about what this is "supposed" to look like and how it is "supposed" to be. The security of having enough and having packed and being fully prepared becomes an issue, the issue being that they won't need to depend on anyone they meet along the way, and can just bring people what they already know. IE "Dont worry, sit down and listen to me, I have things to tell YOU"... pretty colonizer-ish, in terms of behavior, no?

But Jesus gets right in the way of all of those issues before they get a chance to take root, and tells the twelve: put it all down and do not bring it.

Because the participation in God's mission begins not when we are fully prepared — but when we are willing to discover that we never were, never are, never will be...and maybe most importantly, that we never needed to be.

A Word About Sodom, Gomorrah (And Who Actually Gets It Right)
Now — I want to sit with one more thing in this text. And it's a bit painful. Jesus, at the end of this passage, invokes Sodom and Gomorrah. And if you are queer (or if you love someone who is) your stomach probably turned a bit. Those two cities have been weaponized against queer people for so long. Wielded alongside Paul's letter to the Romans (Chapter 1, especially) to justify violence, exclusion, and all kinds of sexuality-based hatred. The wound from that is real. It is deep. I am not sure it will fully heal in this age of the world.

But hear and notice this, too:
The destruction of Sodom and Gomorrah had nothing to do with sexuality. And if it wasn't clear enough in the Hebrew Bible where Jesus got the reference, Jesus makes it even more explicit here in this telling from Matthew. He is not invoking these cities to condemn any particular kind of person or love. He invokes them because what brought them down was the utter refusal of hospitality. The abuse of strangers. Violence toward the vulnerable. As the prophet Ezekiel names it plainly: Sodom had pride, excess food, prosperous ease, and did not aid the poor and needy.

That's it. That's the sin. That's what Jesus is naming at the end of this passage: people's failure to be hospitable, to embrace strangers, to reject violence will result in their own destruction.

And then he is saying to his disciples: when you are met with violence, rejection, the withholding of basic human welcome, don't stay there and put up with the abuse. Get out. Shake the dust from your feet. That kind of inhospitality carries its own consequences. You don't need to take responsibility for any of it.

And I'd also like to point this out: think about who in this world has learned extraordinary hospitality because they've known extraordinary rejection. Who has built chosen family, often out of nothing. Who has learned to really see one another, to really hold one another — especially when everyone in the group is massively lacking what's needed to be prepared, and everyone has to stick together just to get by.

Queer folk. That's who.*

And these are exactly the people God sends. "These" being the folks who weren't prepared, whether through their own choices, or through the choices the world made for them. These are exactly the people through whom God builds something that lasts. That is not a coincidence.

God doesn't seem to call on people who are or feel fully prepared. Moses had a stutter. Jeremiah was a child. Mary was an unmarried girl in an occupied country. The disciples were fishermen and tax collectors and people who repeatedly didn't seem to understand. Nonetheless, they were all called. 

It seems God calls and sends the ones who say yes, with empty, open hands.

The Question For Us This Week
So the question Jesus is pressing with this peculiar, sparse, slightly aggravating packing list is not: Am I adequately prepared? Am I educated enough? Am I resourced enough? Do I have the right equipment?

The question for us this week is: What are we carrying around and coveting that is preventing us from doing the healing and loving and building God is already inviting us into?

Is it a need for achievement? Expertise? Respectability? Productivity? A need to know how everything will turn out, right, and that we'll maintain our image? Any of that sound... creepily familiar?

Here is the terrible and liberating news: we don't actually have control over how these things work out anyway. Kind of like how we think death is the end, but Jesus goes and proves otherwise with Easter, so we don't need to be afraid? Well, this time it's like this:

We don't ever have the control we think we have. We will never maintain our image anyway. Things will not go the way we plan them. And God incarnate — the one who could have arrived with every resource imaginable — chose instead a gal named Mary, a ton of tables (hardly any of which were his own) set with bread and wine, a borrowed tomb, and not much else.

He ended up on a cross because he was more committed to people than to image and success strategy. 

We are the disciples, friends. We have always been the disciples. And this mission God invites us into does not need us to be fully prepared. We just need to be ready to say yes.

So what might it do if we choose to set a few things down, in favor of being ready with a yes over trying to hang on to things for preparedness?  We could set down attachment to outcome. Appearing to have it figured out (fake it till you make it- oh I detest that line). Or maybe even just letting go of one of the many fears that manifest/whisper in your head when you're trying to go to sleep at night: you're not ready, you're not enough, you're not the right person for this, you're not prepared for what's to come...

Scripture is full of the unprepared. I think that is a huge chunk of the wisdom so many people across time are attempting to communicate to us via the Bible. Being well-resourced and fully packed was never required, nor was it ever the point. The point is participation. Right now. With the people who are all around us. Being in and with the circumstances that are actually here. Choosing the moment that is actually happening now.
Building trust. Offering hospitality. Caring for one another. The simplest way to say this is: Loving one another the way Jesus loved us.

We are called across two thousand years, through time and space, by the same Jesus who sent those twelve out into the dust and heat with nothing but authority and the instruction to go.

And the going? That is how hope gets made. That is where love takes root. That is where growth happens — not in the planning, not in the preparedness, but in the being ready to just show up.

Things will get hard. For many of us, they already are tough. Shaking the dust from your feet when you're met with violence or refusal is real, and real painful. Jesus named it. Discipleship has always included it.
But let's remember that we do not do this work alone. We do it together, with one another, and with the God who does not need us to be prepared, only to be ready and willing to say yes.

with joy,
Pr Sam

*Please to note: Queer folk are not a perfect communion of folk (other than perfect in our colorful and sparkly imperfections!). And, many other folk who have experienced the pain of rejection, who build chosen family and have had to learn to really care for one another despite the world's behaviors also build and maintain beautiful hospitality and care at the core of their communal lives. It just so happens it's Pride, and that means I'm highlighting the queers!

This sermon is for the person who's been hurt by religion and isn't sure what to do with that. It's for the one who's tired of performing faith, or who suspects the loudest versions of Christianity they see right now aren't the whole story. It's for anyone who needs permission to just... reach, or keep reaching.

The reading:
As Jesus was walking along, he saw a man called Matthew sitting at the tax-collection station, and he said to him, “Follow me.” And Matthew got up and followed him. And as he sat at dinner in the house, many tax collectors and sinners came and were sitting with Jesus and his disciples. When the Pharisees saw this, they said to his disciples, “Why does your teacher eat with tax collectors and sinners?” But when he heard this, he said, “Those who are well have no need of a physician, but those who are sick. Go and learn what this means: ‘I desire mercy, not sacrifice.’ For I have come to call not the righteous but sinners.”
While he was saying these things to them, suddenly a leader came in and knelt before him, saying, “My daughter has just died, but come and lay your hand on her, and she will live.” And Jesus got up and followed him, with his disciples. Then suddenly a woman who had been suffering from a flow of blood for twelve years came up behind him and touched the fringe of his cloak, for she said to herself, “If I only touch his cloak, I will be made well.” Jesus turned, and seeing her he said, “Take heart, daughter; your faith has made you well.” And the woman was made well from that moment. When Jesus came to the leader’s house and saw the flute players and the crowd making a commotion, he said, “Go away, for the girl is not dead but sleeping.” And they laughed at him. But when the crowd had been put outside, he went in and took her by the hand, and the girl got up. And the report of this spread through all that district.

Take a moment and ask yourself: Who is Jesus, to you?

Before we read this Gospel together on Sunday, I asked everyone the same question.

Maybe he’s a healer type. Maybe he’s a prophet. Maybe he’s more of a community organizer. Or maybe, for you, he’s truly divinity walking the earth, emanating light wherever he goes. My answer doesn’t matter here. What matters is who Jesus is for you.

The Jesus Who Doesn't Quite Fit
Now — and this is the hard part — read the Gospel excerpt again, and see if you notice a Jesus who is not quite like your Jesus.

You know what I mean, right? If your Jesus is the one doing miraculous healings, it might strike you that here he tells a woman it’s her own faith that heals her. Or if your Jesus is the one who dies on the cross to wipe your sins away, it might snag you that here he’s telling the Pharisees he’s come for mercy, not sacrifice.

Hold onto whatever didn’t quite agree who Jesus is for you. It will matter, a bit later on.

As I sat with all three of our readings this past week, I found a thread running through them, and it’s a strange one for a religion with such a loooong history of altar-building. Hosea, speaking for God: I desire steadfast love and not sacrifice, the knowledge of God rather than burnt offerings. Paul, to the Romans: the promise comes not through the law but through faith (through trust, through relationship) and so it’s guaranteed to everyone, not just the people who got the rules right. And then Jesus, sitting at a table with tax collectors and sinners (the “wrong” people) when the religious professionals start asking their scrutinizing questions, he quotes Hosea right back at them: Go and learn what this means. I desire mercy, not sacrifice. You gotta love Jesus with a pithy response, quoting scripture to the scripture professionals. 

So God is not asking for sacrifice. No need for the burnt offering. (Though I do love me some incense.) No need for the performance of religion—and not just the temple-or-church kind. I mean the kind we still do, inside the building and out. The self-sacrifice that hollows you out and calls itself holiness. The exhausting project of being good enough, clean enough, sure enough, perfect enough, caring enough, etc., etc., etc. God keeps saying, across centuries, in three different readings on this one ordinary morning: that’s not what I’m after. I’m after you. I’m after a thing between you and me.

Thing is... This is also the famous weekend where Jesus says, Those who are well have no need of a physician, but those who are sick. I have come for the sick. We love this verse when we get to be the ones welcomed in. Or when we're quoting it as a justification in the face of our (many, and quite human) failures. And we should. This is good news. Jesus didn’t come only for the wealthy and the perfect. 

The Sickness That's Easy To Miss
But I want to turn it slightly, because I think there’s a sickness here that’s easy to miss. The sickness I mean has to do with our Jesus. Remember that little exercise we did, listening for the Jesus who didn’t quite line up with the one who is “ours”? The gap between the Jesus you brought with you and the Jesus who is showing up in the text?

I don’t need you to tell me what your gap is. That gets to stay private. I didn't ask for share time because I genuinely want you to think about this and be honest with yourself about it. Consider what the Jesus in this story actually does, or doesn’t do:

The woman with the extensive bleeding reaches out and grabs his clothes. And Jesus doesn’t perform a miracle according to this text. He doesn’t wave magic hands. What he does, according to this story, is turn and say: Take heart, daughter. Your faith has made you well. Except the Greek doesn’t quite say “made you well.” It says sesōken se, or, your faith has saved you. The reaching saved her. The trust saved her. Jesus is saying: this was you.

That is not a powerful "I did it for you" Jesus, by the world’s measure. That is a Jesus who tells a woman her own desperate reach was the thing that healed her. And that is very different from the version of faith on the loudest stages of our country right now.

Jesus’ version, the one we find here, is frankly kind of timid. Supportive of people who are afraid and willing to try anyway. The versions of faith we tend to encounter on the loudest stages is strong, certain, armed, and frequently very sure of who’s in and who’s out. It supports golden statues and all kinds of agendas, some we easily name as a problem, and others that even our proud, educated selves are oddly fine with, because they might benefit us one way or another. 

That big-stage version of faith is powerful, yes. It is also a sickness. And it would have no idea what to do with this Jesus in the excerpt we got today. The one at the table, the one telling people to go learn what mercy, not sacrifice means, the one who lets himself be touched and then tells people their own faith is what healed them. This Jesus refuses that over-and-above "strong" kind of power. Jesus does not refuse power itself, though. Make no mistake, there is enormous power moving through these stories. But Jesus refuses the power of the sacrifice, the altar, the laws, the empires, the strongmen. He instead chooses the power that moves through bodies and relationships: through mercy, through trust, through the dangerous tenderness of letting someone touch you and then affirming that touch. That’s not weakness, but  it’s also not what the world tends to call powerful. And simultaneously...it’s the only kind of power that has ever actually saved anyone in any lasting way, from what I can tell.

So- at any rate: whatever snagged for you earlier — whatever in this text didn’t fit the Jesus that is "Jesus for you" — I hope you'll hold him gently this week. ​Because, God desires mercy, trust, and relationship rather than sacrifice. And one of the ways we resist that invitation is by clinging to a domesticated, personal Jesus instead of letting the living Christ challenge and change us. So maybe that Jesus who didn't quite fit is exactly the one who is trying to reach you, hoping to be heard and praying to that what he's showing or telling you will work. 

A Different Kind of Power
It's pride month. And, though almost every one of my sermons is incorporating something or someone queer, I'm going to be more overt about it in the coming weeks. So- as if this sermon weren't already queer enough just in its format... are you familiar with the (queer!) artist Spencer LaJoye? They recently moved to California from the eastern side of the US, and they have a song you might recognize: Plowshare Prayer. (That link is LaJoye singing it live — go listen before you read on. Really.)

The lyrics pray that if a prayer was once used as a sword against you, this one might instead become a plowshare — something that breaks you open so you can grow.

And if that line doesn’t bring you to tears, there’s another I can’t get past:
if you don’t want healing, I just pray for peace.

Here’s what I want you to notice: Listen to that song and see if you can hear Jesus in LaJoye's voice. Because to me, that's exactly who LaJoye is channeling. 

To the queer kid wrestling with life in a compulsory heterosexual world, Jesus turns and says, hey- I see you. Your reaching is faith, and it has already saved you. To the trans person who has been denied in entirely too many ways, Jesus says, you are not dead. Even if these fools are out here as if you are. To the one who is exhausted from running the Silicon Valley treadmill and just wants to be done, Jesus says, amen. To the person who got hurt by church and has been circling the door ever since, half-hoping, half-braced for it to hurt again Jesus says, if you don’t want healing, I just pray for peace. He doesn’t even assume a cure. He lets the woman reach. He takes the girl’s hand only when asked. He sits at the table and invites us grow and learn what it means: mercy, not sacrifice.

anyone can try this, you don't have to have been in a church on Sunday...
​
Put on the Plowshare Prayer. Then sit for a moment with the place where "your Jesus" and the Jesus in this story (or even in this song!) don’t line up. Don’t fix it. Don’t resolve it. Just notice it, and ask what the Holy Spirit might be trying to offer you. Maybe it's mercy, not sacrifice.

with joy,
Pr. Sam

A few sources behind this one, in case you want to chase them down: Spencer LaJoye, whose Plowshare Prayer carried the whole back half of this sermon; and the Jewish scholar Amy-Jill Levine, whose work keeps is awesome about keeping us Christians away from attempting to make Jesus' own Jewish tradition a villain — in this case, as Levine points out, the woman who reaches for his cloak isn’t breaking a purity taboo, she’s a person daring to be seen, and that’s the part that matters. ​

based on Matthew 28:16-20 and Genesis 1:1-2 for Trinity Sunday, Year A


Before we go anywhere, watch this ridiculous video. It's three minutes, it's St. Patrick, and it's the best little summary of why we should all be nervous when Trinity Sunday rolls around: Lutheran Satire — St. Patrick's Bad Analogies.


Every year at least a few preachers (why, I genuinely do not know) attempt to blaze a brand-new trail and explain something Christians have spent two thousand years failing to explain. Father. Son. Holy Spirit. Three. One. One. Three. At some point, every Trinity sermon becomes a hostage negotiation with mystery. The preacher backs slowly toward the analogy that's going to set everybody free, and the analogy turns out to be a heresy. Foiled again!


So, I don't think explaining is the point of Trinity Sunday. Wondering is. Noticing is. Maybe even just plain ol' protesting, is. So this past week at church, I didn't preach at anyone. I asked the room to wonder and notice with me, and then tossed in the protest idea on top.


Here's what we did: People found a couple of buddies and everyone had a set of questions with about eight minutes to (quickly) move through the questions and share with one another. The invitation was to think about transformation. About the experiences that actually change us. And then to listen to each other for themes, for patterns, for the kinds of places and situations that seem to be generative. The kinds of places that teach us something. These were the questions:


1) Tell a (short) story about a time when you changed your mind about something important. What happened? What made that change possible?


2) Where have you learned the most important things in your life? What kinds of places seem to teach us things we could not have learned otherwise?


3) When have you encountered something that did not fit your expectations? Something that forced you to rethink what you thought you knew.


If you weren't in the room, sit with those questions yourself for a minute before you keep reading. What did you notice? What showed up over and over? Were there patterns in the kinds of experiences that changed people? Patterns in the kinds of places where that change tended to happen?


Here's what almost always surfaces when we do this:
Very few of us changed because someone handed us a perfectly correct formula. Most of us changed because experience interrupted our certainty. Because reality turned out to be larger than our categories. Because of some encounter (with creation, with another person, with a moment we didn't see coming) and not because we sat down and reasoned our way, ex nihilo, from nothing, into a new self.


And here's what's interesting: I'd argue that is exactly where scripture keeps trying to point us, too. Not toward certainty. Toward noticing that our growth and transformation comes through experiences that showed us our understandings are far more multi-faceted than we initially thought. Nothing in scripture is static. Everything is in a state of becoming, and comes with all kinds of fluctuations. And the becoming doesn't happen inside the safe house of certainty—it happens in the wilderness, in threshold spaces, in the places where co-creation is actually underway, in the encounters where entities are being made and remade together.


Start at the very beginning. Genesis begins with co-creation. It is not God alone, conjuring out of a void. We're told there are already waters, and there is already spirit—ruach—hovering over the face of those waters. Which is kind of wild, when you sit with it. There's no doctrine here. No neat categories. No proof of correctness offered up front. The very first thing this creation story hands us is mystery and movement: God, co-creating with elements—water, and mud, and words, and Spirit. God who, at one point in these stories, is even referred to as they. There is a multiplicity already inherent in the text. (And to be clear, I'm not reading that "they" as a tidy Trinitarian proof tucked into Genesis for us to find later. It's stranger and more interesting than that. It's the plurality that's just there, in the text, before we Christians showed up attempting to tame and colonize.)


And that multiplicity carries forward, too. God met in many experiences, many modalities, mostly in wild and in-between places. In fire (burning bush, anyone?), in wind, etc. The Israelites receive the commandments while wandering. Moses meets God in the wilderness, and then on a mountaintop. Hagar meets God in the face of death in a desert. Elijah meets God in the wilderness. Desert. In-between. Threshold. These spaces keep becoming revelation spaces—and maybe that's precisely because certainty and comfort let us build neat categories, and the neat categories become cages, and the cages let us... relax so much that we stop paying attention.


Then Matthew takes us to one more threshold, one more creation moment. A mountain top. (Nice parallel to Sinai, no?). The risen Christ (yet another form God is showing up) now turning to the disciples and saying, essentially: it's all you, folks!" And listen to the line that comes right before he says it: "they worshiped him; but some doubted." Uncertainty stays in the frame. Nobody graduates into perfect clarity. And yet Jesus (God- three in one, one in three) commissions these doubting, faltering, full of terrible ideas and ill-conceived notion people to go and do the work of co-creating the close-by realm of heaven anyway. With God. Just Aas they are.


So let me ask the real question:


What if Trinity Sunday is less about pinning God down, and more like a little tricky protest weekend that is in actuality asking us to show up with our little protest signs that say "free God." What I mean is, free God of the cages and the assumed constancy and the never-changing-ness and the doctrines we have built around God for centuries.


Because here is the thing: the cages we build for God become the cages we build for ourselves. Every time we decide in advance who God is and what God will and won't do, we are not only shrinking God, we are shrinking ourselves, and shrinking all of creation. We are shrinking the very possibilities, the potential, the hope for what we might yet come to be in more alignment with the realm of God.


The cages we build for God become the cages we build for ourselves. Let me say that twice, because it's the whole sermon. Trinity, Genesis, wilderness, the Great Commission-- all of them keep telling us the same thing: God exceeds our categories, and God keeps inviting unfinished people into the ongoing work of becoming, with God, in a world that is in an ongoing process of becoming.


So you see, I think maybe Trinity Sunday is not primarily a doctrine to explain, but a protest against every attempt to reduce God to a fixed category. Because God exceeds our categories, human beings and creation remain unfinished, invited into ongoing co-creation and transformation with God.


The disciples leave that mountain unfinished. Still wondering. Still becoming. Still uncertain. The text literally says they were doubting—faltering—and it does not seem to have been a problem for Christ. They don't leave only with their doubt. They leave with a responsibility: to keep walking with Jesus, with God, to keep becoming and to help others come along.


And the same is true for us. The future is still open. The kingdom of heaven that is so close at hand is not quite here yet. And God entrusts that unfinished future to this unfinished creation—that Genesis story does, after all say "in the beginning" -- not "in the end"... which means we are somewhere gloriously in the middle, for now.


So here's where I'll leave you, in the in-between, where the becoming is still happening: What might grow among us—if we just freed God, and let the collaboration really take off?


with joy,
Pr. Sam

This week's sermon is a direct result of the work of Sr. Ilia Delio, who came up with the idea "Free God." In her case, she said in an interview that if she were to show up at a protest, she would just have one little sign that would say "free God." Sr. Delio is a brilliant scientist and theologian, I cannot recommend her work highly enough.

based on Acts 2:1-21 and John 20:19-23 for Pentecost Sunday, Year A
On Pentecost Sunday, we return to that locked room in John 20 — where frightened people are hiding behind heavy doors — and to the wild scene in Acts where the Spirit lands on all flesh without asking permission first. This sermon sits with the particular kind of locked room that educated, thoughtful, progressive people tend to inhabit without realizing it: the one that looks like wisdom from the inside. Into that room, and into this specific political moment where the word "Christian" is being weaponized to decide whose body counts, Pentecost arrives with breath, fire, and the ancient insistence of the prophet Joel that the Spirit falls on all flesh — not approved flesh, not respectable flesh, not economically useful flesh. All of it. The question this sermon leaves you with is not theoretical: what locked room have you mistaken for wisdom, and what would happen if you finally opened the door and let yourself (or others) out?

​The doors were locked.
John tells us why: fear. These folks were afraid. Specifically, in John's words, of "the Jews" 

...but let me translate that into modern language for our ears today: what John is describing is fear of religious leadership in cahoots with government leadership, willing to kill a totally innocent guy. Judaism is not the problem, here.

So yes. They were afraid.
And for all my joking about these stooges known as Jesus' besties, at the core of things, their fear is completely reasonable. The disciples were not cowards. They were people who had watched someone they loved be murdered for the crime of… well, no actual crime.

So there they are behind their locked door. And there goes Jesus, walking right on in anyway.
Ironically enough, he says: "Peace be with you."

Right, man. Have you seen what is happening out there? Trouble has been brewing for a while, and you yourself were publicly executed quite recently. Peace my butt.

At any rate — then he breathes on them.
Not all that unlike Genesis 2, where God breathes life into the mud creature known as Adam. Or Ezekiel, standing in that valley of dry bones saying: I can tell the truth to these bones, but if they are going to live again, God, you are going to have to breathe. Jesus breathes onto these frightened people hiding behind locked doors  in this room that has kind of become a tomb.
Or maybe even a womb.
Something enclosed. Something waiting. Something probably not meant to stay sealed forever.

And I have been thinking about that locked room-tomb-womb. Not  the disciples' - though-- I've been thinking about ours.

There is a very specific kind of locked room that educated, thoughtful, progressive people tend to live in. And the thing is: it does not look like a locked room from the inside. From the inside it looks like being informed. Wise. Ethical. Up to date. It looks like reading the right (well researched!) things and having the appropriate (logical really) opinions and mostly talking to people who already agree with you because they are intelligent and see the issues at hand clearly. From the inside, this all feels a lot like being engaged and involved and thinking critically, with clarity.

You would never guess we're operating in a room with a locked door. Unless you happened to be someone were standing on the outside. Someone like Jesus. And the Holy Spirit, who don't care about our locked doors.

So anyway, here comes Jesus through locked doors, bringing breath and Spirit, and effectively shoving people out of the room.

And you notice the direction of the Spirit in both John and Acts is outward, right? Toward the city. Toward the street. Toward other bodies. Toward the messy world outside.

It seems like a lot of spiritual language treats all things Holy Spirit as internal. Private. Interior. Personal. But based on what the excerpts we got today say, the Holy Spirit in scripture is rarely private. The Spirit interrupts. The Spirit gathers. The Spirit sends. The Spirit moves people.
Pentecost is not a story about private spirituality. Pentecost is a story about bodies and fire. Lots of moving, interacting bodies and hot, breathy fire.

There's that line from the prophet Joel in Acts: I will pour out my Spirit on all flesh. Your sons and daughters will prophesy. Your elders will dream dreams. Even upon those the world has pushed to the bottom — even upon them, I will pour out my Spirit.
All flesh.

We are living in a time where our government is actively using the word Christian to justify deciding whose body-- which flesh--counts. Whose body is legally recognizable. Whose family is valid. Whose gender will be acknowledged. Whose disability is inconvenient. Whose suffering is too expensive. Whose existence can be turned into a political talking point.

And directly into that reality, Pentecost. Mx. Holy Spirit (truly a kween if ever there was one) arrives boldly declaring: all flesh. Not some flesh. Not approved flesh. Not respectable flesh. Not economically useful flesh. Just simply: all flesh. Every body in this room. Every body outside this room. Every body the world has scapegoated, ignored, criminalized, abandoned, or deemed disposable.

The Spirit falls on all flesh. Not metaphorically. Actually.
And that really matters, because Christianity as espoused by people who want it to support governmental initiatives seems to keep trying to be selective about bodies, attempting to control and put limitations on our very human, fleshy, made-in-the-image-of-God bodies.

Meanwhile: the Holy Spirit remains profoundly uninterested in our designs, and keeps landing directly on all flesh, pouring over every single body, refusing to wait for institutional permission.

And then, there is the fire. Think about what fire actually does. Fire transforms what it touches. It does not leave things unchanged. Fire burns. Fire illuminates. Fire spreads. Fire changes the temperature of the air around it. We lean on fire for life. And though we work very hard to control fire, fire is most often not especially interested in our permission or our will.

The disciples did not ask for fire. They were up in their locked room trying to stay safe together. And into that room: Jesus' breath, Mx. Holy Spirit, and good old transformative-won't-leave-you-the-same-fire.

Pentecost is not comfort arriving, unfortunately. Pentecost is transformation beginning, and continuing. And maybe that is why some folks like to reduce fire to metaphor instead of seeing it for it's literal reality. Because metaphorical fire is easier to manage. We can say "What does it mean?" to a metaphor, and get right into an intellectual rabbit hole, justifying all our categorizations and in-groups and out-groups. But actual fire does things. Actual fire changes things. This isn't about wht does it mean, it's about what it does. And what "it" does ("it" being fire, and Mx. Holy Spirit, in this case) is generate the kind of change and transformation that pushes people out of their locked rooms, away from their comfortable echo chambers, and allows people to understand one another and love better. And that-- that changes what is possible.

But here is what I notice about us  (and when I say us, I mean us here and like, the United States US). Us people who are high achievers, who read and assess and strategize and try very hard to get everything exactly right. Us people who calculate carefully, tracking whether the timing is optimal, questioning whether we are prepared enough.

Mx. Holy Spirit is the kween, and she is profoundly uninterested in all of our achieving and optimal condition tracking. Following Mx. Holy Spirit will cost you something. That is not a flaw in Christianity. That is one of its central truths. The manna arrives after the wilderness begins, other side of our locked doors. 

Mx Holy Spirit does not run risk assessments before loving people. She goes right ahead and falls on all the fleshy people and creatures the world has already dismissed: disabled folks, homeless folks, trans folks, immigrating folks, people without status, people without credentials, people our culture has decided are disposable. And, she is moving and kicking up change before respectable institutions have even figured out whether they're even willing to acknowledge her.

So what about you?

What locked room have you mistaken for wisdom?

What fear have you decorated so thoroughly that it now feels responsible?

What echo chamber have you confused with correctness?

Maybe Mx. Spirit has already set something in your life on fire. Maybe that fire is uncomfortable. Maybe it is burning away something you desperately wanted to keep. Maybe you are standing there with your hand still on the lock, desperately (and ineffectively) trying to negotiate with transformation.

There is no negotiating with a flamer like Mx. Holy Spirit, I hope you know. Nothing stays the same. Not even Jesus stayed with the disciples in the same form forever. Everything that is the Gospel keeps moving toward transformation, toward resurrection, toward release, toward becoming. Mx. Spirit is not going to let our locked room-womb-tombs stay locked forever.

So maybe Mx. Holy Spirit is asking you to let something go.
Or maybe she is simply standing there insisting that you open the damn door already.
Christianity is not about theoretical intellectual discussions held safely behind locked doors and in comfortable echo chambers. Christianity is about becoming people who dance and sing right along with that holy flamer, Mx. Holy Spirit, into the world with our actual bodies — forgiving, releasing, refusing to retain what needs to be let go, so that everyone might be free. Jesus did say, afterall, whatever sins we forgive are forgiven...whatever sins we retain are retained.

The Spirit and fire are here, beckoning us to own our power and get to work.
So, make like the disciples and quit wasting time and effort on trying to keep yourself locked up in one of those womb-room-tombs, refusing to let yourself — or others — out.


with joy,
Pr. Sam

based on Acts 1:6-14 and John 17:1-11 for the Sunday after the Ascension, Year A
On the Sunday after the Ascension, we find the disciples doing something entirely reasonable: standing there, staring up at the sky after watching Jesus disappear into clouds. Two figures in white show up and ask why they're still standing there looking upward. This sermon takes that question seriously. Not as a scolding, but as an invitation to think about what it means to hold both the vertical reach toward transcendence and the horizontal stretch toward one another at the same time. Drawing on Acts 1 and John 17, this reflection proposes a move from theology of the cross to ecology of the cross: a framework that insists God shows up at the intersections of active awe, wonder, suffering, and joy — and that the cross is not a past event but a pattern that keeps forming, without end, wherever love meets the cost of love in a world that resists love.

Two figures in white. Everyone standing there, necks craned upward, watching Jesus disappear into clouds. And then these two strangers arrive and ask: "Why are you looking toward heaven?"

…<side eye> because someone just made like a helium balloon and floated on up into the sky? What were they supposed to do? Look the other way and pretend not to notice?

But my real point here: has anyone ever been asked something in that tone? Not those words, but that energy — the "you're looking in the wrong direction, you're stuck, why are you standing there?" kind of energy. What does it feel like to be asked that — especially when what you're doing makes complete sense from the inside?

If one of the disciples had piped up and said "leave us alone! We just saw something extraordinary!"  Well, frankly, I wouldn't blame them. It's not a wrong response at all. It's pointing at something true and important and wonderfully human, but also innately more-than-human in all of us. The vertical pull is real. The upward reach toward transcendence, toward wonder, toward something larger than us — that is not naivety or escapism.

There's a professor and psychologist over at UC Berkeley, Dacher Keltner, who has spent years studying awe. Not the dramatic, Guinness Book of World Records kind — the everyday kind. The thing that stops you on a walk kind of awe. What his research keeps finding is that awe is not a detour from being present to the world. Awe is what makes us more present to the world. It recalibrates us. It shrinks the ego's grip just enough that we can actually see what — and who — is beside us. Awe and wonder make people more generous, more connected, more willing to act on behalf of others.

This is not soft new-age spirituality. This is peer-reviewed data: wonder is so powerful it is world-remaking.

So the disciples standing there, stunned, necks craned upward, with two fancy divine messengers questioning their posture? They are not failing. Even if it seems like they're being scolded a bit. What they are doing is engaging awe and wonder. And honestly, the challenge is that the stop for awe and wonder can't be the only thing they're doing. And it wasn't. Eventually they went and did exactly what people do when they've been stopped by something enormous: they gathered, they prayed, they tended one another. So in this Acts excerpt, there is a really strong vertical axis (looking up toward heaven in awe and woder)— and a really strong horizontal axis (going on, eventually, to pray with one another).

And because this is real life and not a diagram, these things also go the other way. Sometimes looking vertically is not where you find awe. Sometimes looking up, reaching for transcendence, asking where God is in all of this — is the place of unanswered prayer, unresolved grief, the exhaustion of frustration with God's absence. Sometimes vertical is where you go and nothing happens and you come back emptier than you left.

Conversely, sometimes a few horizontal glances (like an ordinary Tuesday, the meal with someone you love, the small ridiculous joy of something that just worked out, a text from a friend at exactly the right moment) is where simple, uncomplicated awe and wonder actually lives. 

An ecology of the cross — yes, I said ecology, not theology — does not assign permanent meaning or relationship type to a vertical or horizontal axis. An ecology of the cross doesn't claim, for example, that vertical is always the place of wonder and horizontal is always the place of difficulty. Instead, the ecology of the cross claims that both axes are alive, both move, both are operating with us and with God, and neither one cancels the other out.

This fluidity, the way joy and frustration and wonder and grief migrate between the axes depending on the week, is not a sign that the system is broken. It is a sign that the system is alive. It is relational. And honestly, I think it's a big part of what Jesus has been trying to show us all along.

But why are you standing there?

The excerpt we received from John today takes place before the ascension. It's well before anyone was standing there staring up at the clouds watching Jesus float away. In fact, people will be looking up to see Jesus shortly after this but  that look up in the timeline on this excerpt will be seeing Jesus on a cross, not floating into heaven. So here is Jesus, and he is praying, and what he is praying is enormous. Frankly, it should be striking some awe into people: All mine are yours and yours are mine. All of them. Everyone who comes after them.

This is not a small or private prayer. This is a performative moment. Jesus doing this rather loudly, so they all hear and see, reaching outward in every direction. Upward, downward, laterally... across time, across difference, toward people not yet born, toward communities not yet formed, toward everyone sitting in a room two thousand years later (that would be us).

There is a principle in art and geometry: a line, once drawn, has no end. It just keeps going. Sure, we might look at it and say "well the end is right there, where the ink stops" but the theory is that the line never actually stops. It's now implied. It keeps on keeping on.

Jesus, in this excerpt from John, is drawing two lines at once. Kind of like what we saw in Acts, there is a strong vertical axis and a strong horizontal axis — but Jesus uses different words for them.

Vertical: I came from you. I return to you. You are in me.
Horizontal: They are in me. I am in them. And everyone who comes after them too.

And if lines have no end, well, you can see what shape those vertical and horizontal lines make as they inevitably intersecct, right? 

And, notice: Jesus doesn't leave and leave a vacuum in his absence. Jesus leaves, intersections expand.
Whether it's Acts or John, the vertical axis is met with a strong horizontal axis across all kinds of people. Both movements are present. None are abandoned.

Why are you standing there?

Lutherans are devoted fans of Martin Luther's theology of the cross (the concept that says God is most fully revealed not through triumph, power, success, certainty, or glory, but through suffering, vulnerability, hiddenness, and the crucified Christ). A theology of the cross is not wrong, exactly. But it can become catastrophic for anyone living at any marginal social intersection. It can, inadvertently, encourage sanctified passivity, romanticize pain, spiritualize abuse, and (perhaps most perniciously) treat joy, beauty, and pleasure as somehow suspect.

Rev. Dr. Traci C. West, in her book Disruptive Christian Ethics, asks a question that highlights some of the trouble that can accidentally crop up with unexamined language and behaviors around theology of the cross gone wrong. She asks about what we are doing when predominantly fair-skinned communities build their entire theology of salvation around the suffering of a brown-skinned man. What are we doing when we speak of sacrifice of a brown man for our sake, as we approach a communion table--meanwhile, outside the sanctuary, brown and Black bodies are still being subjected to violence that no one is calling redemptive.

Rev Dr. West is not saying: abandon the cross or abandon communion. She is asking in some way however. what is your theology of the cross actually doing in the room and in the world? Who benefits from a framework that centers suffering? Who has historically been asked to suffer more as a result? What does it mean to proclaim the redemptive death of a brown body among people who hold social power over brown bodies in the world outside these walls?

This is uncomfortable. It should be. Discomfort is not the enemy, it is the beginning of honesty. And that honest discomfort is exactly where an ecology of the cross begins. Or, to use a great old Lutheranism: this is where we begin calling the thing a thing.

This is precisely why the move from thinking theology of the cross to living an ecology of the cross matters — not just in our brains, but for our whole earth. An ecology of the cross is an ongoing, ever-moving series of intersections, continuously demonstrating that God refuses to exit, even when the intersection becomes violent.

The cross is not the mechanism of a transaction. It is the shape love takes when it refuses to extract itself from a world that is causing harm. An ecology of the cross is what happens when the vertical and horizontal are both held fully — at cost, without flinching.

An ecology of the cross keeps us mindful that the cross is not behind us. The cross is a pattern that keeps forming, and re-forming, at every intersection of the vertical and horizontal, in every ordinary week, wherever love meets the cost of love in a world that resists love. Every time those two lines cross (vertical- awe, wonder, horizontal- community, one another, creation relationships) the cross is happening again. And because lines have no end — it keeps forming. Outward. Without end.

But, why are you standing there?

The horizontal axis of this whole situation can be really difficult, too. Relationships are genuinely hard. Community is hard. The work of showing up, again and again, in the same room with people who are different from you, who sometimes hurt you, who sometimes need more than you have, who you have to set and re-set boundaries with, who are aging or dying when you don't want to see it happen is really, really hard.

I am not convinced this is a sign that something has gone wrong. I'm not even convinced that the difficulty of the horizontal axis is an obstacle to knowing God. Based on Acts and John today, it seems to me these difficulties and challenges become the primary sites where God is known.

In Acts, the disciples move from their stunned awe to praying with their community. In John, Jesus specifically performs a prayer that speaks of how all his are God's and God's are his, praying for the unity of all in the same way that he and God are united. It's a whole ecology of knowing God and God knowing us.

In a living ecosystem, health requires that everything participate in the upkeep of the whole. Robin Wall Kimmerer (in her book Braiding Sweetgrass) calls this Reciprocal Maintenance. It doesn't have to be done perfectly. Nor without strain. But persistently, reciprocally, with the understanding that your participation matters to the whole even when you cannot see how.

This is what the horizontal axis of the ecology of the cross looks like from the inside: showing up anyway. Tending what is yours to tend. Being a truth-teller (this is also known as prophecy). Accepting repair when it is offered. None of this is glamorous, unfortunately, and none of it moves at the speed of ascension.

In fact, all of this unglamorous work moves at the speed of human relationship and trust, which is slow, and sometimes painful, and absolutely necessary. And yes sometimes this also means knowing when a particular relationship is asking more than is yours to give. The ecology of the cross we see illustrated for us here in John and Acts does not demand infinite self-expenditure. Jesus himself told people to shake the dust off their feet. There is a difference between reciprocal maintenance and unilateral depletion. Knowing when to stay and when to go is not a betrayal of that horizontal axis of care and community-- it is part of tending to the ecology of the cross with prophetic honesty and care. The cross is strong and alive enough to hold that discernment. 

And remember what I said way back at the beginning of this longer than usual reflection: this is real life, not a diagram. The horizontal aspects of the ecology of the cross are not all a downer. Sometimes these are the site of awe and wonder, too. So:

Why are you standing there?

I can't be sure about your core answers and convictions. But I can tell you that I am standing here because this — right here — is where the lines intersect for me. The difficulty and the joy and the awe. The tension of the vertical reach and the horizontal stretch. The frustration and the wonder. All of it.

 This is where God keeps showing up, and so this is where I am also called to keep showing up.

We can't let the weight of the world, the exhaustion of the moment, or even the supposed pragmatism of a worldly "wisdom" that says there's no time talk us out of awe and wonder.

Why not proverbially look up for a while, once in a while? Awe and wonder are not a luxury. Keltner's research shows that clear as day. The disciples standing there, stunned and still, show the very same. Wonder is world-remaking-- it's 50% of the ecology of the cross that Jesus so beautifully illustrated for us, and we need it to keep going. Because living an ecology of the cross includes encountering people and situations across every difference and challenge you can name, and plenty you haven't even thought of yet- and those differences without awe and wonder to help us along, will zap all of our energy and joy and ability to be present to one another, connected to one another (and therefore also connected to God). And, mind that the unity Jesus prays for in this excerpt is not uniformity. It is mutual indwelling across all of our individual particularities. Which is harder than sameness — and more beautiful. All the more reason we need to make sure we take time for wonder and awe.

The cross keeps forming, again and again and again. It has been forming since before we arrived, and it will keep forming after we leave. God keeps showing up at the intersections- in the vertical reach and the horizontal stretch, in the upper room and in the ascension cloud, in the frustrating prayer and the unexpected weekday gladness, in the sufferings and the joys — just waiting for us to join on in.

Why are you standing there?

Maybe because it's time to move to the next intersection.
Maybe because it's exactly where you need to be.

with joy,
Rev. Sam

This sermon is inspired by, and built in no small part on the brilliant work of: 
Dr. Dacher Keltner: his book Awe: The New Science of Everyday Wonder and How It Can Transform Your Life is a genuine gift.
Dr. Robin Wall Kimmerer, Braiding Sweetgrass is an outstanding read for any and every person who wants to live life well.
Rev. Dr. Traci C. West, whose book Disruptive Christian Ethics is brilliant, and full of questions and challenges the church desperately needs to face and wrestle with.

based on John 14:15–21 for the Sixth Sunday of Easter, Year A

A few of you have asked me about my thing with the bees. Bee jewelry makes it onto my jacket every weekend, and there are a handful of reasons for that, but one of the biggest comes from the Easter Vigil liturgy, the Exsultet.
There's this line about the Paschal candle being produced through the work of the bees and human hands together. And I love that image because the production of the very first that comes into our darkened sanctuary after Good Friday is presented not as ressurection magic, but as collaborative effort betwen us, and the bees. Tiny creatures. Human labor. Repetitive work that, brought together, creates the first light in the room otherwise left like a tomb.
Bees do incredibly small work. Almost invisible work. Tiny flights and movements. Tiny acts of pollination.
And yet? Lose the bees, and entire ecosystems begin collapsing.
We so often buy into this myth that meaningful change happens in one giant dramatic moment. But most meaningful change does not work like a lightning strike. It works like mycelial networks underground. Like roots cracking concrete. Like the work of the bees. Even the movements we think of as rather sudden — Civil Rights. Stonewall. BLM in 2020 — those were visible peaks of much longer accumulated labor. Deep community organizing. Conversation. Protest. Feeding people. Acts of art. Presence. Refusing disappearance or silencing.
Tiny, repeated acts that eventually changed entire landscapes. Sometimes with a hallmark moment we all name and remember, like Stonewall. Sometimes without one — which is its own kind of reckoning, like the slow-built pathways of Christian Nationalism that we're watching now. Those were also built one tiny act at a time.
We are in this passage again — a continuation of what came last week, all of it building toward Jesus' official taking of leave. Ascension is coming. Pentecost is coming.
The disciples seem anxious as hell. Those exact words are not written down — but come on. You can hear it in the text. Jesus keeps saying things like do not let your hearts be troubled and I will not leave you orphaned. Nobody says those things when everyone's feeling great. These are the things we say when fear and anxiety are already filling the room.
And it makes sense that the disciples would be fearful. These were people hoping for something clearer. Stronger. Faster. They were living under empire — violence, occupation, exploitation. Their expectations had been wrapped up in a militaristic response to a militaristic regime, and what they received instead was a guy on a cross who then seemed to come back to life. Awesome party trick — but not exactly the thing that feels like it's going to bring down the soldier with the threatening sword when he's demanding more supplies, more money, more compliance from your family.
Any of us would want certainty. Okay, Jesus, sure — God in all of us and in you, but… when do we win?
They wanted specific dates. A clear plan. An underdog victory story. They wanted something to cling to that might make them stop being afraid.
Jesus does not give them a single one of those things.
Instead, he gives them commandments. And if you want to get really technical, he gives them a commandment: love one another as I have loved you. Which honestly sounds deeply unsexy compared to the underdogs taking over and coming out on top. But the wisdom someone thought worth writing down for us to receive is: keep my commandments. Love one another.
The disciples want a conquering system. Jesus responds with an ecology.
They want domination. Jesus responds with pathways for relationship.
They want certainty. Jesus responds by giving them practices. Tiny, repeated acts of love — just the minuscule daily work of the bees.
I think this excerpt from John is easily distorted because we hear if you love me, you will keep my commandments as moral pressure. Like Jesus is standing there with a clipboard. But in John's gospel, commandments are not a list of rules to follow. And in fact, commandments aren't even a list of rules to follow in the Hebrew Bible — they are suggestions for how we live better together, and with God. The commandment here is: love one another as I have loved you. That's it.
Which means Jesus is not saying: prove yourself spiritually impressive. Be some kind of saint. In fact, it's quite the opposite — Jesus is saying: when you participate in love, you participate in God. If you are loving, you know me and you are doing the thing required of you.
This whole chapter is soaked in mutual indwelling language. I am in God. God is in me. I am in you. You are in me. This is ecosystem language. Relational language. Love circulates. Care circulates. Courage circulates. God is not the distant emperor somewhere above the clouds. This is not far from what Luke is writing in Acts: in God we live and move and have our being. God with us via connection, truth, nourishment, courage, protest, mercy, song, bread — through showing up for one another again and again and again.
Zero words about perfection. Lots of words pointing toward participation and collaboration. Like the work of the bees, and human hands.
I also think we can easily distort this passage when we hear I will not leave you orphaned and interpret it as just a line of comfort. In fact, I think this might be the central line of the whole excerpt — but maybe not for the reasons we were first taught.
Because notice: Jesus does not promise the disciples will stop feeling afraid. He does not promise that empire and its overbearing problems disappear tomorrow. There is no promise that the hurts and frustrations and pains will go away. He does not promise certainty beyond this: certainly they will continue to see him and experience him — God — via loving one another.
Maybe I will not leave you orphaned is way less about comfort — and in fact, making it primarily about comfort might be what makes it lose its teeth. Maybe I will not leave you orphaned is more an instructive reminder: you are not orphaned when you remain bound together in love. You are not orphaned when the work continues. You are not orphaned when people keep feeding each other, protecting each other, telling the truth, tending wounds, making art, singing songs, blessing what is breaking, refusing to disappear or silence one another — faithfully continuing on, even when we don't feel like we're getting it quite right.
The world teaches us that power comes through domination.
Jesus skips all of that and insists that abundant life comes through stubborn, ordinary, repeated acts of love. The basic, everyday work of the bees.
And honestly? Bees themselves are not perfect little symbols. Bee colonies operate with hierarchy. They've got their own disagreements, chaos, and problems. They are strange little creatures — just like we are. But they keep participating in the work that sustains life beyond themselves.
Maybe that is the core of discipleship too. Because a lot of us — whether we'll admit it or not — believe that the best way to live well and abundantly is primarily to get things correct, to ensure we entirely dismantle the problems as we go. But that doesn't really work out. All we end up doing is either avoiding the simple everyday work, or reifying the very systems of destruction we claim we're trying to dismantle.
No human is perfect. We are all horribly inconsistent. There is no moral purity among us — and honestly, the more certain someone is, the more suspicious I become.
So maybe that's the invitation and reminder this week. Not perfection. Not moral purity. Not certainty. None of these are necessary.
Just: keep practicing love anyway. Keep participating in courage anyway. Keep telling the truth anyway. Keep blessing what is breaking anyway. Keep on keeping on in the way of Jesus.
Tiny acts. Tiny mercies. Tiny bits of courage.
Because the kingdom of God doesn't come in like a military coup. It comes in more like tree roots cracking up a cement sidewalk. It's the little in-and-out, every-day work of the bees — that eventually becomes that collaborative first light, in a world filled with fear and anxiety, but aching for hope.

​with joy,
Pr. Sam

based on Matthew 28:16-20 and Genesis 1:1-2 for Trinity Sunday, Year A


Before we go anywhere, watch this ridiculous video. It's three minutes, it's St. Patrick, and it's the best little summary of why we should all be nervous when Trinity Sunday rolls around: Lutheran Satire — St. Patrick's Bad Analogies.

Every year at least a few preachers (why, I genuinely do not know) attempt to blaze a brand-new trail and explain something Christians have spent two thousand years failing to explain. Father. Son. Holy Spirit. Three. One. One. Three. At some point, every Trinity sermon becomes a hostage negotiation with mystery. The preacher backs slowly toward the analogy that's going to set everybody free, and the analogy turns out to be a heresy. Foiled again!

So, I don't think explaining is the point of Trinity Sunday. Wondering is. Noticing is. Maybe even just plain ol' protesting, is. So this past week at church, I didn't preach at anyone. I asked the room to wonder and notice with me, and then tossed in the protest idea on top.

Here's what we did: People found a couple of buddies and everyone had a set of questions with about eight minutes to (quickly) move through the questions and share with one another. The invitation was to think about transformation. About the experiences that actually change us. And then to listen to each other for themes, for patterns, for the kinds of places and situations that seem to be generative. The kinds of places that teach us something. These were the questions:

1) Tell a (short) story about a time when you changed your mind
about something important. What happened? What made that change possible?


2) Where have you learned the most important things in your life? What kinds of places seem to teach us things we could not have learned otherwise?


3) When have you encountered something that did not fit your expectations? Something that forced you to rethink what you thought you knew.

If you weren't in the room, sit with those questions yourself for a minute before you keep reading. What did you notice? What showed up over and over? Were there patterns in the kinds of experiences that changed people? Patterns in the kinds of places where that change tended to happen?

Here's what almost always surfaces when we do this:
Very few of us changed because someone handed us a perfectly correct formula. Most of us changed because experience interrupted our certainty. Because reality turned out to be larger than our categories. Because of some encounter (with creation, with another person, with a moment we didn't see coming) and not because we sat down and reasoned our way, ex nihilo, from nothing, into a new self.

And here's what's interesting: I'd argue that is exactly where scripture keeps trying to point us, too. Not toward certainty. Toward noticing that our growth and transformation comes through experiences that showed us our understandings are far more multi-faceted than we initially thought. Nothing in scripture is static. Everything is in a state of becoming, and comes with all kinds of fluctuations. And the becoming doesn't happen inside the safe house of certainty—it happens in the wilderness, in threshold spaces, in the places where co-creation is actually underway, in the encounters where entities are being made and remade together.

Start at the very beginning. Genesis begins with co-creation. It is not God alone, conjuring out of a void. We're told there are already waters, and there is already spirit--ruach—hovering over the face of those waters. Which is kind of wild, when you sit with it. There's no doctrine here. No neat categories. No proof of correctness offered up front. The very first thing this creation story hands us is mystery and movement: God, co-creating with elements—water, and mud, and words, and Spirit. God who, at one point in these stories, is even referred to as they. There is a multiplicity already inherent in the text. (And to be clear, I'm not reading that "they" as a tidy Trinitarian proof tucked into Genesis for us to find later. It's stranger and more interesting than that. It's the plurality that's just there, in the text, before we Christians showed up attempting to tame and colonize.)

And that multiplicity carries forward, too. God met in many experiences, many modalities, mostly in wild and in-between places. In fire (burning bush, anyone?), in wind, etc. The Israelites receive the commandments while wandering. Moses meets God in the wilderness, and then on a mountaintop. Hagar meets God in the face of death in a desert. Elijah meets God in the wilderness. Desert. In-between. Threshold. These spaces keep becoming revelation spaces—and maybe that's precisely because certainty and comfort let us build neat categories, and the neat categories become cages, and the cages let us... relax so much that we stop paying attention.

Then Matthew takes us to one more threshold, one more creation moment. A mountain top. (Nice parallel to Sinai, no?). The risen Christ (yet another form God is showing up) now turning to the disciples and saying, essentially: it's all you, folks!" And listen to the line that comes right before he says it: "they worshiped him; but some doubted." Uncertainty stays in the frame. Nobody graduates into perfect clarity. And yet Jesus (God- three in one, one in three) commissions these doubting, faltering, full of terrible ideas and ill-conceived notion people to go and do the work of co-creating the close-by realm of heaven anyway. With God. Just Aas they are.

So let me ask the real question:

What if Trinity Sunday is less about pinning God down, and more like a little tricky protest weekend that is in actuality asking us to show up with our little protest signs that say "free God." What I mean is, free God of the cages and the assumed constancy and the never-changing-ness and the doctrines we have built around God for centuries. 

Because here is the thing: the cages we build for God become the cages we build for ourselves. Every time we decide in advance who God is and what God will and won't do, we are not only shrinking God, we are shrinking ourselves, and shrinking all of creation. We are shrinking the very possibilities, the potential, the hope for what we might yet come to be in more alignment with the realm of God.

The cages we build for God become the cages we build for ourselves. Let me say that twice, because it's the whole sermon. Trinity, Genesis, wilderness, the Great Commission-- all of them keep telling us the same thing: God exceeds our categories, and God keeps inviting unfinished people into the ongoing work of becoming, with God, in a world that is in an ongoing process of becoming.

So you see, I think maybe Trinity Sunday is not primarily a doctrine to explain, but a protest against every attempt to reduce God to a fixed category. Because God exceeds our categories, human beings and creation remain unfinished, invited into ongoing co-creation and transformation with God.

The disciples leave that mountain unfinished. Still wondering. Still becoming. Still uncertain. The text literally says they were doubting—faltering—and it does not seem to have been a problem for Christ. They don't leave only with their doubt. They leave with a responsibility: to keep walking with Jesus, with God, to keep becoming and to help others come along.

And the same is true for us. The future is still open. The kingdom of heaven that is so close at hand is not quite here yet. And God entrusts that unfinished future to this unfinished creation—that Genesis story does, after all say "in the beginning" -- not "in the end"... which means we are somewhere gloriously in the middle, for now.

So here's where I'll leave you, in the in-between, where the becoming is still happening: What might grow among us—if we just freed God, and let the collaboration really take off?

with joy,
Pr. Sam

based on John 9:1-41 for the fourth Sunday in Lent

Earlier last week, with students, we ended up talking about theodicy. That big theological question: Why does God allow bad things to happen? But as the conversation unfolded, we started noticing something underneath the question itself. Because frankly… it’s not a very good question.

The question assumes a few things right from the start.
First, it assumes a kind of cosmic “sky-daddy” God who is actively controlling every single event in the universe. Many of us simply don’t see God that way. Second, it quietly assumes that when bad things happen there must be some explanation that fits a tidy moral system. Maybe someone sinned. Maybe God is punishing someone. Maybe God just doesn’t care.

Do you see how the question itself limits the world we’re allowed to imagine? It narrows how we think about God before the conversation even begins. And that is exactly what happens in the Gospel reading today.

When the besties (aka, the disciples) see a man who was born blind, they ask Jesus, “Who sinned? This man or his parents?” Notice what they’re doing. This isn’t really curiosity. It’s control. Another way of saying the same thing might have been: “Jesus, please confirm our current world view is correct."

But Jesus refuses the premise. Neither the man nor his parents sinned, he says. And then, instead of launching into a theological lecture, Jesus engages in magical creation: he kneels down and makes some mud.

Mud. Messy, sticky mud. Not even with just water, no, this time with spit. Regardless of the element that made the dirt into mud, we've now got mud-- the  very same stuff Genesis tells us God used to create the first human, the Adam.

Soil. Water. Breath. The ingredients of creation. And here they are again, right in front of everyone. No lofty theological debate. No philosophical defense of God. Just this nice little grouping of mud, a couple humans, and a good ol' rinse off in the local pool.

It’s almost as if Jesus said, “Well shucks… looks like the original pair didn’t quite come out right. Would you like me to fashion you a new set? Go on over and rinse them off, and see how these work for you.”

Creation story, happening again. God’s kingdom coming near through earth, water, consent, and action between two people.

Meanwhile… Everyone else is missing the entire show, in favor of intellectual debate and argument. “I was blind, and now I see” simply was not enough for these people. Instead, the neighbors argue about whether this is even the same man. The religious leaders interrogate him. His parents panic.

This man’s body becomes a battleground for everyone else’s ideas about how the world is supposed to work. The whole scene gets embarrassingly close to the logic we still hear today: “Well… what was she wearing?” You know, the kinds of questions we tend to ask when we'd rather assign blame and preserve the status quo, than face reality.

Every authority figure in this story keeps asking questions that reveal their preferred world view and attempts at control:

“How can a sinful man be from God?”
“Is this really your son?”
“Was he really born blind?”

They’re not looking at what is here and now. They’re trying to force this moment back into their tidy set of intellectualized preferences about how the world is supposed to work.

An excellent way to remain in power.

Systems of power stay in power by controlling the narrative, controlling what counts as truth, and controlling what we understand as reality. The less connected to our bodies we are, the easier it becomes to push ourselves into performing all kinds of oppressive and damaging acts.

Meanwhile, the formerly blind man sticks to his lived experience with a simple statement:

“I was blind. Now I see.” ...

Now, we are living in a pretty muddy moment ourselves (full transparency: have we ever not been living in a pretty muddy moment?).

And just to be clear: I’m saying muddy, not blind. Many people in the blind community rightly point out that blindness is not a good metaphor for ignorance or misunderstanding. So let’s not go there.

Mud is messy material. Mud doesn't stay contained really well. Mud spreads around one way or another. Gets under fingernails, ruins the Sunday best, etc.

But-- mud is also the material of creation. It's the stuff of the Kingdom of Heaven come near. Mud is not an intellectual argument about God- mud is the stuff God used to create us in God's image.. and then took on himself, incarnate in the body of Jesus.

And that's an important thing that's easily lost in this story John gives us. The kingdom of heaven doesn’t arrive through perfect theological explanations that check out. It arrives through spit, mud, collaboration between a couple people, and a rinse-off.

And in this whole story, only two people seem to recognize that this is the case-- and those two people also happen to be the only two people who had their hands in the mud: Jesus. And the unnamed formerly blind man.

The world will keep asking the wrong questions. The wrong questions are excellent tools for leading us away from where we need to be. They are perfect for helping to keep the status quo, to preserve those authoritarian and violent images of God that so easily keep us primed to pay that violence forward. 

But here, the author of John, through Jesus, shows us something else. The kingdom of God breaks through in a way that is absurdly accessible. Not through spirals of vast and winding intellectual argument (And do not get me wrong. I identify strongly with process theology, flirt with radical theology, and happily bathe in affect theory writing by folks like Brian Massumi and Erin Manning. I love a good intellectual spiral.). But-- what we see in this story is that the kingdom of God come near manifests through simple, humble participation. By joining Jesus in the mud, along with the rest of creation, getting ourselves dirty in the messy work of healing right here, right now.
Amen.

- Pr. Sam

Folks who were here in person on Sunday had a bit of mud painted on the back of their hand at the start of the sermon. Perhaps you would appreciate an opportunity to play in the mud, and pay attention to how it feels:

Reflection Practice

Place some mud on your hand(s).
Take a moment to notice what it feels like to carry the dust of creation on your skin. Feel it drying and cracking. Also notice how it doesn't stay put very well- it has a way of smearing about.
Consider where Christ might be inviting you to join the work of healing in this very muddy world, and how that might also smear about and bring others into the work.

Wash it off when you're ready. Some of the people at University Lutheran kept it on clear through to snack time after worship!

Based on John 4:5-42 - Jesus and the Samaritan Woman at the Well | Third Week of Lent

Last week we were talking about snakes — about having to take a direct look at what’s killing us in order to live. Remember that story from the Hebrew scriptures? The people look at the bronze serpent. Jesus connects that story to himself in conversation with Nicodemus. If we want to live, we have to look honestly at what is killing us and collaborate with God in the work of healing.

But this week we have something that seems almost opposite: an unnamed woman (what is it with the unnamed women in these books?) meeting Jesus in broad daylight. No obtuse questions from her.

So here’s a thought experiment: Take a moment to think about this scene and ask yourself: where do violent, authoritarian images of God show up in it? They might not appear directly in the text. Sometimes they show up in the assumptions we bring with us when we read.

For generations this story has often been preached as if Jesus is exposing a sinful woman. But the text never actually says that. That interpretation has been layered onto the story.

And there… you can already see our interpretive habits at work.

In reality, a woman having had five husbands and now living with someone who is not her husband likely reflects systemic vulnerability in the ancient world. It could point to widowhood and being passed off to brothers or other family members. To divorces entirely out of her control. These are social structures she would not have had much if any say in, in most cases.

There is another possibility as well, this one literary:
After Assyria conquered Samaria, several foreign groups were resettled there. Each group brought its own religious traditions. Jewish writers sometimes described Samaria as having five religious “husbands.”

If that is the case, Jesus may be speaking in the language of religious history rather than personal scandal.
Notice what happens next. The woman immediately begins discussing theology. She is not being shamed. She is a capable, sharp theologian participating in a serious theological conversation with another capable, sharp theologian.

Now, we often hear that Jews and Samaritans did not associate with one another. But that leaves out some very important details.

Samaritans were not strangers to Jews. They shared ancestry. Both communities came from the traditions of Israel. The division emerged when returning Judeans rejected those Jews who had remained in Samaria and intermarried with non-Jews.

Womp-womp-womp. We're just mad over something that looks like issues of purity.

Turns out they are not actually strangers at all. This is less like two unrelated groups avoiding one another and more like a very old family feud — the kind where everyone still knows plenty about everyone else and probably talks more than they would like to admit.

Which helps explain why the woman immediately asks Jesus a theological question:
Which mountain is the right place to worship, Mr. Jewish Jesus Smarty Pants? Mine, which was also probably one of yours (ancestrally speaking) at one point? Or yours, which was also mine (ancestrally speaking) at one point? It is theological hair-splitting. And she probably knows it.

Jesus gives her a straightforward answer: neither. The location does not ultimately matter. Worship is not about geography. And apparently she finds something compelling in that answer, because she runs to tell others about what she has just experienced.

Now here is where something fascinating happens. Did you know that authoritarian, violent images of God literally prime our brains and bodies for violence?

As in, literally. Dr. Andrew Newberg’s research shows that when people encounter authoritarian or violent narratives about God, fMRI scans show brain activity in regions associated with threat and aggression.

In other words, the stories we tell about God shape how our bodies prepare to respond to the world.

Which makes it worth noticing something: Many of the assumptions we bring to this story are not actually written into the text. They have been added through interpretation, tradition, and sometimes translation.

So ask yourself: what kinds of images of God have shaped those interpretations? How often have we inherited stories about God that assume shame, punishment, domination, or exclusion — even when the text itself does not necessarily say those things?

When those interpretations go unexamined, they train our bodies to live in a posture of fear and violent response rather than empathy, care, and love — the very things that make relationship and communion possible.

And that becomes a real problem for us as baptized Christians.

Because if empathy, justice, equity, and love are suppressed in favor of violence, suddenly we are all about the name of Jesus but not the way of Jesus. Those authoritarian stories about God are doing more than distorting the text. They actively block the kingdom of heaven from coming near.

Just think about that for a moment.

Last week we talked about those snakes in the wilderness and the bronze serpent. The people had to look honestly at what was killing them in order to live. Jesus connects that story to the cross. If we want life, we must look honestly at the individual and systemic realities of what put him there.

This week we are invited to look even more closely — at the interpretations and narratives that may be keeping violence alive in our own traditions.

But the story also shows us something beautiful. Two people meet and instead of variations on domination, they choose dialogue, honesty, respect, care and dignity. Maybe even a little humor. And that is exactly the environment where what Jesus calls living water begins to flow.

There is also a subtle literary echo here, too. In Hebrew scripture, wells are often places where relationships begin.

Rebecca meets Isaac’s servant at a well. Rachel meets Jacob at a well. Zipporah meets Moses at a well.
Wells are meeting places where something new starts.

So while this meeting between Jesus and the Samaritan woman is probably not a romantic one, it is still the beginning of a new relationship — one grounded in equality, respect, curiosity, and care, maybe even some good quality teasing and laughter. And from there it spreads quickly from two people outward into an entire community.

Violent images of God spread quickly too.

But they shut down empathy. They make connection and meaningful relationship nearly impossible. They keep people divided in ways that serve oppressive systems rather than the flourishing of human community.
It is actually a remarkably effective strategy for taking over a powerful tradition: infect it with authoritarian and violent imagery and watch everything disintegrate from there.

Which means we have work to do: We need to notice when violent images of God appear and actively dismantle them. We need to remind one another that the stories we tell about God shape the way we live in the world.

And if violent images of God prime us for violence, then truthful images of God must train us for something else entirely.

Empathy. Justice. Equity. Accountability. Peace. Love.
Which is exactly the command Jesus leaves with us: Love one another as I have loved you.

with joy,
Pr. Sam

Copious amounts of this reflection have been informed and inspired by the work of Dr. Andrew Newberg  (most especially his work around violent images of God and what happens in human brains), as well as this particular Rethinking Faith podcast with Dr. Shaleen Kenrick. 

Ash Wednesday | Based on Matthew 6:1-6, 16-21

Holy Hilarious, Batman

Has anyone else noticed how ridiculous this scene is? I enjoy picturing Jesus talking to people with a sly smirk, eyebrow raised,

“Oh no— now, you, you don’t be like those people”

You know— the ones marching up and down the streets with their brass bands? Just playing a fancy kick each time they are about to do something? You know— those types.

The ones who …publicize, when they are going to make a major donation. OR- you know, the ones who get out there with their megaphones? Shouting about salvation?? Don’t be like those types, either…

AND— the people who make a big production about working soooooo hard on behalf of…people…— rather than, say, just getting the work done? Don’t be like THEM. Either.

And you know— WE are NOT like them. Not at all. We, about to smear ashes all over our foreheads and then go out in public like this……oops. 🙂

It’s not the Same as what Jesus was talking about— right?

I mean— It’s just LENT, right?
That famous season where everyone knows Christians do things like …

Fast! Give up coffee-or sugar— and then bonus points: BLOG about it!
Collect cash for people who need food— and make it into a competition! Announce the results!

DO NOT eat meat on Fridays!
Definitely keep ourselves a bit more serious here in church— it’s a serious season. No alleluias. No hosannas.
Maybe even just avoid any instruments at all- just chant. Only chant. Because it’s lent.

In fact— maybe give up anything that brings you joy- because its lent.

This is one of those places where not a one of us escapes Jesus’ ability to reach through 2000 years and multiple translations of scripture to give us a nice little loving and teasing slap in the face.

And— don’t think that any one of us escapes the critique—I must admit, friends:

There have been years even ritual-loving Pr. Sam over here has watched carefully to see how the person doing the ashing did the ashing— and let me tell you, some of these people out there are putting that stuff on with a trowel and I would have NONE of it on my face.

Thank Goodness, Travis knows what he’s doing. 

You know, As a kid, I hated Lent and its absurd requirements. To me, this whole concept was entirely foisted upon me. Friday nights spent doing absurd stations of the cross, and then caught up in these vegetarian spaghetti dinners (ok, admittedly, my first kiss did happen in the back stairwell at one of those dinners, but STILL)… on the whole, I resented all of it, and to me- it was in fact all a show. Why even be there, if I didn’t have a desire to be there. Why be told I was giving up sugar if I had no reason to be giving up sugar?

This is, I think, one of those fundamental places our Christian tradition easily goes wrong while trying desperately to do right by people. We land in productivity and shame-based actions in place of faith foundation.

There is a significant difference between a Lent foisted upon you, acted out because it is demanded of you, and a life rooted in lent because you find value in simple practices that help you renew your commitment to Jesus’ way of being people of integrity, people of justice, people of love.

And- don’t get me wrong here- bodily practices are not the problem. Jesus was a good Jew, he knew interiority and exteriority are not a binary. Both matter and work together and inform one another.

Our church elders, somewhere along the way, had the wisdom to know that an annual reminder that we are not immortals— that we too will die, and there’s no luggage rack on the hearse— would be a good thing for us to engage. Recalling that our smallness, despite our immense power, can help us re-orient to what matters, and who matters. To get back to that Christian commitment to the way of Jesus is important.

But wow oh wow, how easily we even manipulate these things, with hardly a noticing--or worse yet, trying to obfuscate the manipulation with overt seriousness that is rooted in false sense of ourselves. No?

So, the thing is, you have to choose your own focus for this season. As for me:

My prayer for us, this season, is that we might take ourselves far less seriously. That we might look at ourselves from the outside, and laugh at ourselves far more and enjoy that laughter, and even have some good playtime. That we might, in that joy and amusement, let the Holy Spirit in to do her work, too.

I’m going to pray that we might find and renew the strength of our collective and individual hunger for God and let it drive us right into the heart of our desirous, adventurous, explorative nature to grow and nourish one another and our world.

And- I'm going to pray that we might realize in new ways that lent is not a singular season at all, but an opportunity to check in on the foundation of our Christian life, inspect the cracks and crevices, see what maybe needs some TLC, giggle about our funny construction methods. Appreciate how God comes right on in and holds us together, good, mediocre, or downright poor.

And you know, I imagine, if we can do just that much… if we can sort of reach a little more deeper depth of soul in these kinds of ways?

We might discover yet another pathway that leads us back to that singular empty tomb, and a very full and alive communion composed not of “me” but of “we”— and that is the kind of resurrection treasure worth holding in our hearts, and celebrating come easter Sunday.  Amen?

with joy,
Pr Sam